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- Are you blossoming?
I recently had an unintentionally big week of socializing. As an introvert, I was surprised by how much it energized me. How comfortable I felt to be myself. Maybe I’m evolving into an ambivert?
First, there was a virtual co-working sesh with an internet friend turned accountability buddy. The next day, I met with a new connection for a cafe chat. Then, Vadym and I took a road trip so he could attend a recruitment day for a PhD program. I tagged along to scope out the city and be present for moral support.
 A French toast matcha latte from La La Land Kind |  Passenger Princess |
While Vadym was nailing interviews at the university, I met up with Raven of RP Digital Studio for boba, which turned into hours of us talking about everything and anything. For our first IRL hang, the vibe was good from the moment she slid into our booth. Barely any time had passed when I suddenly felt inclined to say, “Yeah, we’re friends. Tell me everything!”
After two hours flew by, we decided to hop across the street to grab lunch at JINYA ramen bar (my mouth is watering thinking about the broth of their tonkotsu original ). At that point, I realized anything freelance-related was an afterthought, and it was nice to experience our friendship forming beyond business.
Anytime I engage in a flowing conversation that feels fun, easy, and also, at times, vulnerable, I light up. It’s like going on a first date and feeling a spark — a rare, beautiful experience, even in friendships.
Luckily, I’ve felt the sizzle of a few sparks in the past couple of months after partial self-inflicted isolation, giving me hope. I’ll always find community no matter where I live as long as I stay open and keep reaching.
Sometimes, I feel like I’m waiting to bloom. Like there’s this potential right under the surface, waiting to burst through. But there’s occasionally a little fear or hesitation delaying it.
I chose “blossom” as my word of the year to guide me as I embrace growth and exist outside my comfort zone. Regardless of uncertainties. And no matter the doubts and fear of making mistakes or looking like a fool.
I just spent a whole year stumbling through uncharted terrain and growth spurts as a first-year freelancer and semi-new resident of Dallas, and the most significant lessons have been:
I am capable.
I can change my mind.
I’ll only do it if it contributes to a life that feels rich.
When I say I’m an introvert, but maybe an ambivert, I see it from the POV of these lessons. I know that I love my homebody quiet time, and I also have moments of feeling energized by social interactions if the company I keep is right for me.
I’ve been thinking about a book I recently read called The Neighbor Favor by Kristina Forest. The main male character talks about how he prefers to be alone or with people he knows well. But he’s also learned how to turn on extroversion when a situation calls for him to come out of his shell. I relate heavily to this.
After Vadym’s big on-campus day wrapped up, I went with him to a dinner hosted by professors and current grad students at a beautiful condo. Entering someone’s home where I knew zero people was immediately anxiety-inducing, but I brushed the nerves aside, put a grin on my face, and stayed open as we mingled.
Eventually, strangers became friendly acquaintances, and we were invited to keep the party going at a nearby bar (no professors allowed). All night, I pulled from my inner stash of extroversion while sipping on a hella spicy ginger beer. And at some point, being outgoing with folks I barely knew started to feel natural. I blossomed.
When was the last time you felt like you were blooming? Take a few minutes to explore some questions to open up new possibilities.
What part of yourself are you longing to see blossom in the next few months?
Do you have any fears or hesitations holding you back?
What’s the first step you can take to work towards this period of growth?
Here’s a peek at what I’m zoning in on right now.
I am challenging my body and overcoming limiting beliefs by training for a 5K race.
I am leaning into play and practicing new art hobbies like painting and crocheting.
I am being a more present friend to deepen my relationships.
I am building my freelance writing biz in a way that makes it financially sustainable.
 I love reading in a big hotel bed. |  Cuties |
📚Books
The Neighbor Favor by Kristina Forest
Lily, a bookish introvert, seeks help from her charming neighbor Nick to score a date for her sister's wedding. Unbeknownst to her, Nick is the author and digital pen pal who mysteriously ghosted her. I had a lot of fun reading this book and found it relatable. The romance is sweet and well-balanced with the characters’ individual growth to overcome destructive feelings of worthlessness and isolation.
Heartstopper by Alice Oseman (Volumes 1 - 4)
Have you watched the Netflix series based on this graphic novel series? If not, watch it immediately. It’s so sweet and wholesome, just like the books. After buying the box set, I read them in two days. The series follows shy Charlie and his classmate Nick, a popular rugby player, and their unlikely friendship that blossoms into more. Navigating high school, coming out, and personal struggles, it tackles themes of friendship, mental health, queerness, and the complexities of young love. Even as an adult woman in her thirties, I was giddy reading it. I’ll be buying volume 5 soon!
🎥 Film
All of Us Strangers, starring Andrew Scott and Paul Mescal
A lonely screenwriter's life is upended by his mysterious and charming neighbor and a surreal encounter with his deceased parents, alive again in their childhood home just as they were when they died 30 years ago. His search for connection takes a fantastical turn, challenging him to confront reality. I couldn’t stop thinking about this film for weeks, replaying scenes in my head at the most random times. It’s tender, brutal, and beautifully haunting. The end will stick with me for a long, long time.
American Fiction, starring Jeffrey Wright
A frustrated novelist, fed up with stereotypical portrayals of Black stories, writes a satirical "Black" book under a pen name. Unexpectedly, it becomes a critical and commercial success, forcing him to confront the industry's hypocrisy and his own identity while navigating a complicated personal life. This movie approaches nuance expertly. We felt all the emotions while watching this. It’s a treat.
The Fifth Element, starring Bruce Willis and Milla Jovovich
A cab driver and a mysterious fifth element, representing life itself, must join forces with a priest and a quirky cast of aliens to prevent a cosmic evil from destroying the universe. It’s a colorful sci-fi action movie that’s almost as old as I am. Watching it was a joy, and the set and costume designs were delightful. Chris Tucker’s character is iconic.
📺 TV
The Gilded Age starring Carrie Coon and Louisa Jacobson
In 1880s New York, ambition collides with tradition as “new money” families clash with established "old money" elites (or, as I like to call them, the “old biddies”). Amidst opulent facades and hidden secrets, the newcomers navigate a rigid social hierarchy. I’m obsessed with the storytelling, the characters, and the fashion. I need season 3 ASAP.
Want more recs? I often share what I’m reading and watching on my Instagram stories. Plus, here are my favorite 2023 reads!
 First day running in my new Saucony's |  Added some art! |
🏃♀️ running for two miles when I used to barely be able to run for five minutes
📖 when there’s no waitlist for the library book I want to borrow
💧 this cute water tracker app
🎷 listening to jazz in the morning and at night
🏒 the atmosphere of hockey games
🍗 Paul Mescal’s Chicken Shop Date episode
🚗 selling my old car for way more than I thought I’d get
✏️ praise from happy clients
🌸 updating my workspace to be more cozy
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Thank you, Alice T. and Ashley. M, for your generous contribution last month ❤️
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